I propose that The International House of Pancakes, also known as IHOP, should really be known as The House of International Pancakes.
Let's look at the facts.
1. IHOPs exist in only three countries: America, Canada, and Mexico. There are only 2 IHOPs in all of Mexico, and even though there are about 7 times as many in Canada, let's be realistic; Canada is really just America's hat. I imagine them to be one of those Russian hats, cossacks, since Canada is pretty socialist.
2. In the English language, the word "of" as used in this instance denotes ownership. Therefore, the House is one that has pancakes, and is being described as international, meaning more than one nation. This is confusing, as I showed in my first point. The only other option besides HoIP would have to be IPH, or International Pancake House. "Pancake" would describe the purpose of the house, and "international" would describe what kind of pancakes the place served.
3. They serve more than just regular pancakes. There are crepes (Sweden, Germany), waffles (Belgium), and toast (France), not to mention the large variety of omelettes (Mexico, Colorado) and cheeses (America, Switzerland) they offer.
So the next time your family wants to go out for pancakes, please, for all of our sakes, boycott IHOP and suffer a little bit in the taste category by visiting Denny's or Village Inn.