Making Amends

I can't figure out for the life of me what tomorrow is. I know it's an incredibly important day, but it continues to elude me. It's even worse, because I distinctly remember forgetting about this day last year too, but I still can't remember why tomorrow is so important.

I got it! I remember now.

Happy Birthday Grandpa Bud!! Sorry I missed it last year, but I hope this one brings another great year of the 3 F's: food, fun, and family.

In actuality, I forgot another important occasion on February 14th last year: Valentine's Day. Part of Most of the reason I forgot about this "important" "holiday" is because it's really not that important to guys. My argument last year was pretty much why should one day mean so much if you attempt to treat your special lady great every day of the year.

Boy did I learn my lesson. I pulled out all of the stops this year, short of dropping a couple thousand on a plane ticket for her or me so that we could be together. It sucks that we're apart. I really wanted to see Valentine's Day. (Does anyone know HTML coding for force-vomit?)

More power to all of you guys back home. I don't envy the role you are about to undertake in T-minus 20 or so hours. Still, maybe my girlfriend's different. Maybe she would have been content with a nice dinner at Texas de Brazil and a game of putt-putt. Hahahahahahahahahahahaha.

To be honest, I really wish we were together. I'm glad I don't have to be put on the spot about going to that movie, but maybe we could have worked out some kind of equal trade. Hahahahahahahahahaha.

There I go again thinking this day was about sharing time together. Nope, Valentine's Day has become the woman's fourth birthday, behind her actual birthday but ahead of Christmas and the anniversary. But would I give all of this insanity up? Not ever.

♥♥ Happy Valentine's Day Valerie Rohan! ♥♥

Bad Birthday

I have a pretty unfortunate date as my birthday. Not the worst date; I wasn't born on December 25, or January 2, or February 29. But I was born on February 16. This is horrible for two reasons: 1) I have to buy things for my girlfriend two days before my own birthday; and 2) my girlfriend is going to dump me on the 15th so that she doesn't have to buy me things for my birthday.

Fortunately, she worked today, better known to most of the western world as St. Valentine's Day. Don't worry, women of the blogging world. I took her out to dinner on Thursday at the Melting Pot. February 14th is just a day of the month. "Valentine's Day" is a scam by the greeting card and chocolate companies to make more money.

A guy shouldn't need a special day of the year to show his girlfriend/wife/mom/sister how much she means to him. For the record, there's a different distinction between each of those. I did live in Kentucky for a few years, but I'm still cool guys.

Back to what I was saying, though, girls are funny creatures. Hear me out first, please. They need constant affirmations that they are beautiful, or smart, or whatever. This doesn't mean you should say something just because they need to hear it. You really have to mean what you say to a girl, unless it's bad of course, in which case it is always a joke, ladies.

So taking a girl out on a Tuesday, October 19 should mean just as much as taking her out on Saturday, February 14. Only then can the hold the evil corporations like Hallmark and Godiva have on all of us.

And here's to hoping I still have a girlfriend on Monday.

The Accusatory Ambush

For some reason our society has degenerated into one that feels the best way to resolve a conflict is to ambush our opponent. Our scientists and left-minded thinkers claim we have evolved so greatly from the chimpanzee-like ancestors we came from, and yet we still rely on animal tactics to solve our problems.

Part of the problem is that men and women function on a fundamentally different level. On the whole, women are emotional beings, and men are logical. Before some women throw out some snide comments about how men don't think logically when directions need to be asked, or chores need to be done, or just about anything else we do, I basically mean in an argument men and women act and think this way.

So with that said, women tend to be more guilty (although not entirely) then men of the accusatory ambush. For example, The Jerry Springer gets its ratings from men and women coming on and accusing each other of marital and relational infidelity.

A local radio show where I live has a segment called "The War of the Roses", where the host arranges to send a fake bouquet of roses from the accused party, while the victimized party listens in. Today's episode was actually funny when the call backfired on Sarah because her boyfriend said he was sending the Rachel, who turned out to be his cousin that broke up with her boyfriend on New Year's. Sarah then says she didn't believe him, because she couldn't lose face after she had gone through this entire underhanded tactic.

Is this what our world is coming to? A problem between boyfriend and girlfriend, or husband and wife, one of the most intimate relationships attainable by human beings, has to be settled or brought to light in the public forum? I'm going to go to sleep tonight; wake me up when the world makes sense again.

One Month and Counting

Me and Sonny's girl have been together for a month now. Everyone she knows is "rooting for me".

My Mom the P.I.

So I haven't told my parents much about the girl I like, partly because I don't want to jinx anything, partly because it's fun to watch them squirm. But a coworker let slip that there was a girl in the first place, and that she works at my favorite restaurant Sonny's. So my mom had that much to go on.

Today she asks me who so-and-so is, referring to the sister of a friend of mine. We had all gone to the game this last weekend, and my friend's sister had posted pictures online. My mom came across a photo of me from the game via the all-seeing eye of Sauron that is Facebook. And so she asked me who this girl was.

I didn't respond, which for some reason confirmed in my mom's mind that this was the girl. Eventually I convinced her that this was not so; also that she was really creeping me out by investigating so thoroughly.

Now I'm getting ready to leave, and my mom still won't let it go. She says she is going to call my roommate and ask him who the girl is. I respond that she doesn't have his number. She says she get his number from my sister. Then she gets on the computer and goes to the cell phone bills. She begins looking through all of the numbers I've dialed, cross-referencing them with the area codes most commonly associated with my roommate's home state. She states a number. I say it is actually my roommate's dad's number. As I was leaving she had started looking for the number I was calling the most often, assuming that it must belong to the girl.

And after all this trouble she gave me, she still expected me to give her a hug. Mothers! haha

I Love Sonny's! (said in a sing-song voice)

A little back story first. Every Friday for the last 2-3 years, I have eaten dinner at Sonny's BBQ. I realize it's bad for me. I know I'm probably shortening my overall lifespan. I don't even know why I like it so much; there are better restaurants out there.

But nevertheless I have gone every week, with the exception of Fall 2007 when I was studying overseas in Japan, and the occasional unavoidable Friday night event. My love for Sonny's can only be described as an unhealthy addiction, probably akin to people who are addicted to heroin. I even tend to get "the itch" when 5:00pm Friday rolls around.

So it makes sense that with this extreme(ly creepy?) love for Sonny's, it would be hard to find a girl that could compete for my affection. But maybe I don't have to. Maybe I just need to find a girl that works at Sonny's. That way all my love can be consolidated. The good news is, I might have found said girl. The news is it's still early, I'm not a fortune teller, and I have no idea what will come of this. The bad news is I won't be going to Sonny's this week or next due to scheduled plans and a wedding.